asking for signs

I was hoping JayR got in, giving me the sign I asked for. I guess the one up above doesn't want me in a dirty game, which mess I might not be able to clean up. Or maybe He just wants me to continue to be patient, stick it up to Tee, try to be insensitive for some time, and wait for the happy ending. Couldn't I just have the happy-ever-after ending soon? I'm stressed to the core, my eyes are always sore. and this trying-to-be-numb is such a chore.